Sunday, February 28, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Why BACK to the hospital, you ask?
Well, quite simply, because we needed to go.
KSL Radio invited us to come and assist in their annual fundraiser
for Primary Children's Medical Center.
So of course, we absolutely agreed.
If there is any way we can help that wonderful place and those amazing people,
we will absolutely do it... for the rest of ever.
They gave us our boy back.
Healed and whole.
How can you ever put a price on the life of your child?
We could pay that hospital bill a hundred times over and never come close to repaying them.
They did what we could not do for ourselves.
Some people believe that medical science and faith are at odds.
At opposite ends of the spectrum.
I believe they are two languages telling the same story.
Seeking the same eventual truth. Perhaps with varying methods.
Or differing means working towards the same end. The same goal.
I believe our loving Father in Heaven guides the hands and the hearts of those here on earth
who have the knowledge and training to assist Him.
I believe that He allows us to do as much as we can do, to the best of our abilities,
to allow us to learn and grow, and to further research and knowledge.
And then I believe He steps in with His grace, and does the rest of the work necessary
to accomplish His will, whatever that may be.
In Bronson's case, it was for him to LIVE.
And not just live, but live HERE.
And not just here, but WHOLE.
Again, we could NOT be more grateful.
Ever so grateful.
Yet this gift we've been given will not go without price, philanthropically speaking.
And we are eager and ready to pay it in whatever way we can.
Expecting much of ourselves and our family.
We will serve willingly wherever we can.
Like at the KSL Radiothon.
And so we dropped everything, made the arrangements and went.
And for my soul, still healing.
And even good for Matt, who does NOT like the spotlight.
He ate up all the attention.
Ran around like crazy.
Played fetch with the stuffed moose.
High-fived the tech-guys.
Explored the set.
Flirted with the team of call takers.
What a cutie.
They all loved him.
He ate popcorn from a cup and threw it onto the floor.
Which we tried our hardest to prevent, but well, that's why parents have hands.
And why they make vacuums.
To clean up messes.
So we told our story yet again.
And asked for help.
Not for us, but for the hospital.
And for other children who need it.
We asked people to open their hearts and their wallets and give to a worthy cause.
There is still plenty of time.
The Radiothon goes through tomorrow.
We aren't the type that like to ask for things.
Especially for money.
But if you feel so inclined,
and if you have a dollar or more to spare,
this would be a wonderful way to spend it.
It all goes toward a deserving child.
Every single penny.
While we were at the hospital, I read a poster with a quote from Abraham Lincoln.
"To ease another's heartache is to forget one's own."
It struck me so strongly.
I knew this was the key the moment I saw it.
And we have tried to do that.
Tried to share the surplus of support we have been blessed with.
Tried to share and ease the burdens of others we have met and love.
Well, today I am making a choice.
This trip to the hospital tonight was as much about healing me
as the last one was about Bronson.
I have decided.
I am done feeling guilty.
I am done being ashamed.
I am done feeling like the poster-face for negligent mothering.
I am done beating myself up for a momentary lapse in judgement.
I am done feeling feeling crappy about all the pain I have caused.
Because I am not perfect.
Never will be perfect.
Not in this life.
But I can make a difference.
I can lift another's burden.
I can look for ways to serve. Give back. Share.
And I have found a voice.
That voice is getting stronger the more that it speaks out.
And as I speak from the keys on this little laptop,
I find my heart full and overflowing, often with words that are not mine alone.
For God has found a way to use me to strengthen others.
To strengthen you.
Perhaps this was not something I did, but something He allowed to happen.
For my own good. And for the benefit of others.
Knowing that I am stronger than I feel.
And have more to share than I knew.
But believing I had the tenacity to discover it.
Knowing Bronson's miracle would lead to others as it's ripples spread,
touching lives around the globe.
Today is a new day.
The day I learn to turn my pain over
I am still not sure exactly how, but only that it's right.
And that it's time.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
As we try to settle back in to our life,
everything feels so similar, almost comfortable...
but somehow surprisingly different...
I guess we are still trying to find a new "normal"...
But this is about as 'normal' as it gets around here!
STRAPPED tightly into their highchairs,
giggling at my silly lunch-making antics...
like Peanut Butter & Jelly Peek-a-Boo.
These two little stinkers are like two peas in a pod!
B follows his big bro around all day, just starstruck.
Mimicking every motion and gesture. Repeating the inflection of every phrase.
Eager to be on to the newest mischevious adventure.
D eats it up.
Loves to be the center of attention. Loves to be adored.
Such a pair.
Oh, what would I do without the TWO of them!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
As we acclimate back into "real life"
and marvel in the joy of just being HOME together,
our wonderful, a-MAZ-ing and completely over-achieving sister, Mindy,
is putting this great event together in our behalf.
The blessings just seem to have no end.
We are absolutely thankful.
We are also grateful
that this will provide us with a much-needed opportunity
to thank so many of you for your love and support,
and allow us to throw you a bit of a Thank-You Party!
So whether you run, or not... please
Come celebrate the gift of life with us
in honor of Bronson's second chance!
There will be a 5K and a Children's 1 Mile Fun Run.
Both starting at 9 am
Food, Games, Prizes, Raffles, Bounce Houses!
Register online @:
We look forward to seeing you there!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
For the little pile of fishy cracker crumbs I get to vacuum from beneath the kitchen High Chair...
For the big, slobbery kisses smeared at the bottom of my full-length Bathroom mirror...
For two stinky little bums to change, and a diaper genie I get to empty...
For onesies to bleach... and wash... and fold... and put away for another day's use...
For bottles and sippy cups to empty from the Dishwasher...
For the pudgey, pounding little Fred-Flinstone-feet that toddle to answer our doorbell...
For the kisses blown abundantly to strangers, and to friends alike...
I am thankful for the never-ending chaos...
Grateful for the grimey little smudges on my Television screen...
Delighted to re-roll the potty-paper from half way across the room... yet again....
Appreciative of the wild, little maniacs I am able to chase and tickle to hysteria...
Oh, those contagious little giggles...
How I adore them.
How undeserving, and yet how exultant I am to collect them.
How welcome are those eager little arms, wrapping around their Mommy.
Oh, how very fortunate am I...
Sunday, February 14, 2010
We thank you forever for your prayers and your faith on behalf of our little family. We can not thank you enough for helping us to call down the healing powers of heaven to fix our broken little boy. We know that Bronson lives today because it is Heavenly Father's will that he be allowed to stand as a testimony of His miraculous power . We hope to make the most of this second chance. There are truly no words that can express gratitude of this magnitude. Just joy... Pure joy!
Love- The Staker Family
Friday, February 12, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
If you'd like to see our sweet boy on TV,
As if we haven't had enough miracles...
This morning we've made another few big steps toward coming home!
B is walking!
He is playing fetch with his new favorite ball!
(Thanks, Auntie Krista!)
And he is off all oxygen and support and is on only minimal monitoring.
No one can believe it!
It is all smiles here!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
HE SMILES AT ME WHEN I TICKLE AND PLAY WITH HIM!
Let us never be afraid to share our testimonies boldly.
Monday, February 8, 2010
As soon as it was over, he began to seem tachypneic ( pronounced tah-kip-nic).
That's a big fancy way to say he was breathing really fast and hard,
with a heart rate to match.
He seemed to be pulling in so hard for air. Like breathing through a straw.
Retractions heavy. Head bobbing. Looking exhausted.
They bagged and suctioned him.
I hate that.
A little after 4, I noticed his tummy looked a little too rounded.
It was unmistakably distended.
I pointed it out to Molly, the Nurse, today.
She called in Cory, the Nurse Practitioner,
and together they decided another NG (Nasal Gastric) Tube was the best course of action.
Using a large syringe, she pulled out over 180 cc of trapped air
and about 50 more cc of stomach fluid. Poor kid.
Once out, it seemed to relieve the pressure and his tummy softened and looked normal again.
A little after 6, he had his 8th poopy diaper of the day.
As I changed it and weighed it for the nurse, I noticed that his poor bum is looking quite red.
Not just a normal red, but bumpy and fierce.
I knew right away it was yeast from the antibiotics.
Molly called Cory again, and they both concurred.
They wrote up an order for Nyastatin ointment.
Around 8, they started him on his final SBT for the day.
He was resting so soundly, I wondered if it was really worth bothering him.
The RT assured me that it was worth the exercise
if we want to strengthen his little lungs enough to have a chance at extubation tomorrow.